How many people can you offend at once?

By Alex Fauth

The following was written by me for the "Fear and Loathing" DitL. At the time, I thought that it may have been a little bad taste. Yeah, the person who writes Sandra and Vic thought that. So, instead I'm dusting it off and submitting it as a 'deleted scene' for an Omake. Enjoy. Or not.

Looking down at her, Phil tried to think of all the things he liked about Levisha. He liked her bubbly personality. He liked her body. He liked the purple streaks in her hair. He liked her numerous piercings. And he liked the way she giggled when she squeezed the trigger on an automatic weapon.

He stood up and began dressing. For the last month, life had been good for the pair of them. The Zero Zone had proven to be the ideal place for the pair of them to be together and in love where nobody would bother them. Before they'd come here, the pair of them had been in a fair deal of trouble. But now all that was behind them.

Unfortunately, Jinsei had come along and stepped headlong into their perfect little world. Now there were heavily armed men on every corner, taking potshots at everything they came across. Phil didn't like their chances that much any more. He figured that sooner or later they'd find the pair of them, and then there would be trouble.

"Morning luv." Levisha began as she rolled over in bed to look at him. "How's things?"

"Not so good." He replied. "I reckon Jinsei are gonna be on top of us today. Tomorrow maybe. But I'd say we ain't got long."

She sat up in bed, deliberately exposing her breasts. He had to love them and the cosmetic surgeon that had done such masterful work on them, and that little dragon tattoo that weaved so provocatively around the right one. "Well..." She smiled coyly. "If we're gonna die soon, I think there's one thing we have to do first." She glanced over at a small box in one corner of their squat.

He looked at it too. "You think?"

"Might as well." She said. "We ain't gonna have the chance to enjoy it otherwise."

"Cool." He grinned.

She swung out of bed and began to get dressed. He liked the way she dressed, that trampy goth punk look that showed so much skin between the black. It was cool. He especially liked her big, thick, steel-tipped boots. She'd always made sure those were in great shape.

The Zone had been so good to them, he thought. He could almost imagine the looks on the cops faces when they found out where the pair of them were. He just wished they'd been there to see it. After all, they'd been chased across the country leaving a trail of gruesome murders behind them. And their signature calling card.

It had taken the cops a while to figure it out. Something that they'd found at each site. Something all the victims had in common. They were all dog owners. At each murder site, their dog had been found nearby, injured, presumably by the attackers.

Levisha picked up the box. "Hello Pepe!" She said, cheerily. "You ready for your big run today? You gonna run for mummy? Hmm?" She lowered the box and opened one end of it. A small Chihuahua nervously stepped out of the box, twitching in fright. "Oooos a god boy then?" Levisha cooed. "Oooooos a good widdle boy?"

Phil grinned. "Lets' do it, baby."

"Lets" The pair of them locked lips for a minute, before running.

"Run, Pepe!" Levisha shouted. The dog stood there, twitching. "RUN!" Not needing to be told twice, it leaped into the air and scurried off.

"So, who gets the boot in?" Phil asked.

"I dunno. Whoever finds him first, I guess."

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